No More Cookies, Muffins or Desserst in 2013

Last night, after watching DJango in the theater, we left the theater at 10:30 pm. When I looked at the time I was like “Aw, Man!” and I confessed to Bret that what I felt like doing was going to Trader Joes and buy vegan cookies. 

When we got home and I was determined to make banana walnut muffins (I used this recipe)I made 6 mini muffins and waited 25 minutes for them to bake….I ended up eating them all, sharing just one with Bret.  

I joined Bret in bed, we cuddled and we talked about what great day we had with each other. While I was lying down my stomach was not happy with me; I felt nasty and full (since we ate a large dinner that evening). Then I said to me, “Okay, that’s it. No more sweets.” I am sick of eating sweets. I recognized that feeling of being sick and tired of eating out of control. I felt the same way at midnight December 24/25, 2010. Two years ago, I set a goal to get in the best shape and fitness of my life ONCE and FOR ALL and compete in my first bikini competition. 

Because I’ve felt the same determination before and I accomplished my health and fitness goals, I know I can do it again! I am tired of giving in to sweets. So I have decided that for 21 days in 2013 I am going to live cookie/muffin/cake free. Then after 21 days we will see if I crave it or if I kick the habits for good. 

Oh, by the way, I just want to say that I look up to my father-in-law, Jim. He has not had sweets in 35 years. His last bite of cake was on his wedding day (with Bret's mom) and he no longer craves sweets. Today he can easily say "No, thank you."  

Love,

Bea

The shooting of more than 20 (children and adults) in Newtown, Connecticut today was horrific

Everyone asks why this happened? How could someone kill children at school? It has everything to do with mental health.

We all tend to neglect mental health because we don't see it. Even if we don't have a major mental illness, many of us fail to recognize how our thoughts and feelings shape our actions. I feel I am still in shock and I need to digest this incident and then I can talk about it....

One thing I can say is that we must show our love and appreciation for our loved ones every day. It is a hard things to remember, but we must so our best when we can. What happened today made me ask myself if I am letting people in my life know I love them as often as I should...?

This morning when I woke up I kissed Bret and when as he was waking up I told him, "It feels so good to wake up next to you every morning!" and he just smiled and hugged me. When Bret left to work today I kissed him and wished him a nice day. Then later this morning after hearing the news I realized that I could also have happened at Bret's school; he is a high school history teacher. And that is when I got scared.

I also thought about my nieces and nephews all of who are in college (1), middle school (2), elementary school (4) and in pre-school (4). And the thought that this could happen in their schools scared me and I cried. I cannot imagine what the parents and families of the victims are going through. I feel so sad for the children witnessed and their parents.

I find it to hard to articulate my thoughts and feelings.

Love,

Bea

12 things I’ve learned in 2012

Here are 12 things I’ve learned to do better in 2012:

1.    Sleep – Sufficient sleep is crucial for the body to rejuvenate. It's a beauty secret.
2.    Food – Eating mostly plants is essential in order to thrive.  It's a beauty secret.
3.    Exercise – Exercise often; our body was made to move. It's a beauty secret.
4.    Listen – Be an active listener and do not interrupt. If you forget what you were going to say when it's your turn to speak you listened well.
5.    Body language – Body language reveals more than we imagine!
6.    only – Be thankful and appreciate people every day.
7.    Beauty – When you see your inner beauty, you see beauty in everything and everyone!
8.    Speaking up –Now this one is hard to do, but every time I speak up it get's easier and easier to do so. If I see/hear injustice, racist, homo-phobic, anti-immigrant or sexist comments I will speak up. (If Fox "News" is on at the gym I will ask them to turn it off and explain my request. I even admit, "I don't know" something and ask for clarification.) Speaking up takes A LOT of courage and we must not stay silent.
9.    Reading and Writing – It is exercise for the brain. Good books stimulate the brain and expand horizons. Writing doesn't stress me out anymore, it's muscle I enjoy flexing :)
10. Focus - I am still learning to focus. My short-attention span is challenges everything I do. Cut I am closer and closer to mastering my mind.
11.    Actions speak louder than words – Don’t just say you’ll do it, do it. Don't just say "I love you", prove it.
12.    Commitment – Don’t over-commit yourself. Know your limitations and don’t be afraid to say no. In the end saying yes is like saying no to other  priorities. Saying yes to things/people/events that are not going to take you in the direction of your vision is like saying NO to your highest priorities.

These have not been the only 12 things I've learned in 2012 -- there are a whole lot more, but these 12 popped into my mind without hesitation. I am still learning to improve them, however.

It's a journey, not a destination.

 Love,

Bea

So many different feelings in just a few hours of one Saturday afternoon!

On Saturday I went with Bret to LMU so that he could do some final edits to his movie Si, Se Puede. He first told me he would just need 15 minutes and we would be out. But 15 minutes turned into 3 1/2 hours! By that time I was fed up, tired, hungry, thirsty, irritable...I was mad and I told him so.

The reason I was mad was because he told me one thing and we ended up multiplying that by 14 times! But you know what? I didn't blow up, I was calm and I tried to be understanding. Although he had already uploaded his video on YouTube once before, in those 15 minutes he realized his video needed MORE work!

As I waited for him I loved seeing what a task-oriented person he is-- as he is with everything. He took care of all the little details, the sounds, the credits, everything. I didn't know this, but he actually gave me credits for being the Set Manager and Casting Director!

Helping Bret make this short film took a lot of work: phone calls, text messages, Facebook messages and conversations (to get extras), buying supplies to make the signs, making the signs, buying an preparing food, etc. It was a lot of fun, I really enjoyed it!

I wonder if I'm always goign to be enthusiastic about making all of our lives? What will happen  when we have kids or life get's even more hectic? Well, I am preparing for that. I know that his career and mine will occupy a lot of our time. Sometimes he will be way from the family; sometimes I will. But we are both determined to make things work.

So as I was waiting him in the little studio, I was able to get a lot of work done, yay! I was very happy about that, but it was looong! I realized that when I need to get work done, I need to lock myself up inside a little room that only has a desk and a chair; no internet and no bed. But in case I need a nap, I will have to bring a little pillow :)

  Bret hates to see me angry and he always tries to figure out why I got upset in the first place. We walk backwards and analyze the root of my feelings. We replay the situation and come up with ways we could have avoided getting upset. More than often, he puts himself in my shoes, and naturally, I put myself in his shoes. We talk it out calmly and we allow the other one to speak. Eventually, we work it out and we laugh together again! 

Love,

Bea